Letting go.
It's never easy to let go of a love one. I wish my parents are still alive so I can share with them the fruits of my labor. I envy those who still have parents and grandparents for they still have people who truly love them.
My patients last Friday were very sick. I was wishing that it will be a nice day as it was the last leg of a four day stretch of 12 hour shifts. One patient was in his 50s and comatose. The other patient was in her 90's and she's just running out of gas. I had three good days and a bad day is due to happen.
Taking care of the patients was challenging. Watching the families of both patients deal with their denial was painful. They tried to fish some good news from me but I can't find anything good to report.
The doctors unsuccessfully tried to place them on do not resuscitate condition. The grandson of the elderly woman was specially having a hard time dealing with reality. He has had confrontations with nurses, transfering his anger to them. That day, I was right there on his sights. Everything I say comes back negative. I tried to end the conversation with him and he manages to make a bg deal about it. I called the social worker on him so she can deal with his issues. I don't have time to baby sit a 29 year old man.
I don't know anything about this guy but the way he has been acting around his grandmother, he did something that he regrets. He accussed me of being uncompassionate. What? Shit I showed up to work didn't I? I don't appreciate it when someone judges me because their mind is clouded with guilt. This guy, I thought to myself, is the one who doesn't understand compassion.
There is more going on but for confidentiality reasons, that I will respect, I will skip them all together. Let me say this, this guy will be in therapy for years to come. That is if he asks for help. Suicide is a good option too. Hopefully he finds other means to deal with his issues.
He stayed around after talking with the social worker. He asked for my help but my teflon shield is up and I deflected all his requests. Sorry fucker, screw you. He left only to be replaced by another idiot, his brother. He is more emotionally stable than his sibling but at this time, I don't give a fuck anymore. He asked for the doctor's phone number and I gave it to him. After a few hours the doctor showed up and reported that the grandson was requesting for a dialysis treatment. The doctor refered to the grandson as a jerk. Apparently, he was comparing his grandmother to his friend's father. Great, a moron trying to be a doctor. I later found out that the grandson works for a mortgage broker.
It is hard to deal with death. It's a final state and no one comes back form it alive. I learned to deal with it early in my career knowing that I will be exposed to death rather frequently in critical care.
In general, the day was busy but not bad at all. The other nurses were very nice and good team players. Luckily, they supported me when the grandson was having a fit. That makes a whole lot of difference.
It's never easy to let go of a love one. I wish my parents are still alive so I can share with them the fruits of my labor. I envy those who still have parents and grandparents for they still have people who truly love them.
My patients last Friday were very sick. I was wishing that it will be a nice day as it was the last leg of a four day stretch of 12 hour shifts. One patient was in his 50s and comatose. The other patient was in her 90's and she's just running out of gas. I had three good days and a bad day is due to happen.
Taking care of the patients was challenging. Watching the families of both patients deal with their denial was painful. They tried to fish some good news from me but I can't find anything good to report.
The doctors unsuccessfully tried to place them on do not resuscitate condition. The grandson of the elderly woman was specially having a hard time dealing with reality. He has had confrontations with nurses, transfering his anger to them. That day, I was right there on his sights. Everything I say comes back negative. I tried to end the conversation with him and he manages to make a bg deal about it. I called the social worker on him so she can deal with his issues. I don't have time to baby sit a 29 year old man.
I don't know anything about this guy but the way he has been acting around his grandmother, he did something that he regrets. He accussed me of being uncompassionate. What? Shit I showed up to work didn't I? I don't appreciate it when someone judges me because their mind is clouded with guilt. This guy, I thought to myself, is the one who doesn't understand compassion.
There is more going on but for confidentiality reasons, that I will respect, I will skip them all together. Let me say this, this guy will be in therapy for years to come. That is if he asks for help. Suicide is a good option too. Hopefully he finds other means to deal with his issues.
He stayed around after talking with the social worker. He asked for my help but my teflon shield is up and I deflected all his requests. Sorry fucker, screw you. He left only to be replaced by another idiot, his brother. He is more emotionally stable than his sibling but at this time, I don't give a fuck anymore. He asked for the doctor's phone number and I gave it to him. After a few hours the doctor showed up and reported that the grandson was requesting for a dialysis treatment. The doctor refered to the grandson as a jerk. Apparently, he was comparing his grandmother to his friend's father. Great, a moron trying to be a doctor. I later found out that the grandson works for a mortgage broker.
It is hard to deal with death. It's a final state and no one comes back form it alive. I learned to deal with it early in my career knowing that I will be exposed to death rather frequently in critical care.
In general, the day was busy but not bad at all. The other nurses were very nice and good team players. Luckily, they supported me when the grandson was having a fit. That makes a whole lot of difference.
