Orientation Day 2

It's colder than a brass monkey's ass out there. 32 degrees. Freaking freezing in Southern California standards. It's criminal the poor palm trees.

Orientation was more like disorientation. Boring as watching grass grow. We know most of these things already. Give me a break. But, it's free money. I like that. Sit here for 8 hours and get paid. Not bad.

Lunch was okay, it's cheap and edible. Unlike other orientation, this one is not free. We talked about hospital gossip. Interesting what other nurses go through.

My upper left teeth and gums are bothering me. The temporary crown is small and there is a gap in between the teeth. Food particles are jamming in between the teeth causing the gums to be swollen and it hurts.

I took a nap after work thus messing my sleep. I stayed up again last night until 1 p.m. great. I need to stop watching this overhauling show where they carjack people's car with the help of their relatives and they set it up as a situation. As they play with the owner's emotions and mental health, they beef up the car's engine. No let me replace that to replace most of the car. The chassis was repainted with top of the line finish and designed by Foose, a designer extraordeniare. The junk car becomes a hot rod. Like the Swan show on t.v. I watch this because I wish it will happen to me. Doubt it. I don't own a car that junky. These peoples cars are so junky that they are trash when they were carjacked. Now they are classics. Bastards.

Orientation Day 1

It's my first day of orientation at my new job. Yehay, new beginning. My Second this year. How much new beginnings can I have per year? Scary, I'm in my late thirties and I'm still searching for my nirvana. I know, I know, it doesn't exist but I refuse to grow up. I guess that is the problem. Or is it?

Everytime I talk to people I only talk about my twenties. My thirties is just work and paying the mortgage and the bills, not fun to talk about. One time someone ask me how old I am and I said 28. I was petrified. I can't believe it. I read somewhere that we need to be young again and to start playing like a child. There is a child in each one of us. I guess I'm practicing it too well.

If I keep telling myself that I am getting old then I start feeling old. I start thinking young and I'm starting to feel young. Heck, I'm not going to jump out of planes to parachute or bungee jump off a bridge or a balloon. I'm just going to think young so my body doesn't get old.

Don't worry I still dress appropriately and act appropriately at my age. No reason to be stupid.

The issue of my marital status came into attack once more. One woman at our orientation was just so surprised that someone like me is still single. First she said "well, you are not ugly (what a relief) and you are a nurse (I have work). " It's good being gay was not introduce. Otherwise, I need a therapist. That will be the worst coz that means I'm acting like a gay person which I'm not. That is a relief. I aske her why my being single is so bad. She just said she wants me to be married. That's not new. Everywhere I go people wants me to be married. As if I'm not looking, I am. I just can't find her.

After this little conversation all the fun of marriage came out. Oh, this lady does have fights with her husband. She have issues with her daughter and it goes on and on. I just smiled and raised an eyebrow. The other nurses were laughing and looking at me. Nodding their heads.

The thing is the single nurses at work are much younger and the one's my age are set on being single or being hard to get. Jeez, hard to get. Hello, time is running out sweet heart, your clock is ticking. LOL. Oh well, that's your problem. I would like to have a kid but not a no. 1 priority.

Happy thanksgiving.

Not a big deal of a holiday for me. Why? because everyday I am thankful for everything I have. No shit, why shouldn't I. I came to this country with only the clothes on my back. I basicaly got what I dream off. A great education, good job, nice house, nice cars, family that tolerates me, a few friends that I can rely on and most of all I'm single. LOL

I'm not eating turkey this seaon. I'm eating ham. I'm leaving the fat off as that thing can really do damage to the body. I'm here in my house enjoying a quite day. Dinner will be with a friend at a restaurant. No biggie. He's used to visiting his mom but she passed away a few months back so it's either with me or his brother and sister in law. They fight a lot so he doesn't care about that on Thanksgiving.

I like crowds now and then but I treasure simple quite moments. I guess I'm a loner, but who cares. I don't plan on blowing people up or taking over the world. I try to learn how to speak and read Spanish, learn how to run a businees, keep my garden looking like a garden, keep my cars running, learn how to use a large format camera, get back into developing my own film and using my enlarger again, keep visualizing about me driving a Bentley and owning a large mansion with a staff of people to manage my house, visualizing that I am traveling around the country to see the sights, and lots of other dreams.

Some folks like to raise kids, be soccer moms, plan futures with their significant others, save for college, plan for retirement, and all that family related issues. Arrgh, not my style.

What bothers me is why realtors make more money than nurses. They sell houses and they make 10% of the price. If the house is in the millions, then that's a lot of commission. I know a nurse who married an unemployed guy. He went to study real estate and for some reason hooked up with selling estates. She told me he makes more money in one sale than she does in a year. She drives a Lexus SUV, one of those 470 top of the line things. She does nursing so she doesn't go bored at home. She lives in a gated community with an infinity pool. Nice. Maybe I should marry a realtor. NOOOT. It's true not all of them sell estates.

The bad thing is that the salary in nursing seem to have reached a cap. Hospitals just can't afford to keep afloat with the rising trend in salary. They got smart and ceased raising the salary.

Basketball is a sport that I've enjoyed as a boy. It's the only pro game in the Philippines that is televised. I remember Crispa and Toyota teams. I've never liked Toyota. I still don't, I don't own any of their product. I think that's for another blog.

In the states, basketball is big. I loved the Lakers since I'm from the LA area. The Clippers, well, they're the Clippers. I'm not a fan of a losing team. They should be forced back to San Diego.

There was an incident that happened when players from the Pacers went ahead and crossed the line and started assaulting fans in the stands. It was the most despicable act in any sports I've seen. Million dollar salaried players punching and kicking the fans. The excuse was someone threw drinks at them. A plastic cup with soda or beer. BIG FUCKING DEAL. I always tell my brother, about these players. They do not knowing how to act civilized once they start making the big money. I guess money doesn't make one civilized. One's upbringing affects one's action more than money. Granted these basketball players are young and make upwards in the tens of millions of dollars, they are no different to me than any other people. I rather respect a janitor than these players. A big mouth player called Barclay was interviewed and he said that once a fan touched a player, the player has the license to beat up on the fan. Yup, he can't even conduct a civilized interview. Despicable buffoon.

Look at the rappers. Their violent backgrounds always seem to get them killed or in trouble. Driveby killings and the riot at the Vibe awards. Monkey see, monkey do. Disgusting.

Look at Kobey Bryant. The fool with a pretty wife, tons of money, and a great NBA career. How can he get in the position where a white trash slut was accusing him of rape? Delusions of grandeur I guess. He is so rich no one dare fuck with him. Well, guess again, dude.

I'm not saying that they all end up like this. Magic Johnson is doing philanthropic work despite of being infected with the HIV virus.

I wish I can run up and down a parkay floor shooting hoops. Hey, I don't mind being one of these players. I have delusions of grandeur also of driving a Bentley, a mansion and doing a white trash slut. Hehehe, just kidding. I don't mind a Bentley and the mansion.

Another half a week gone. We are now nearing Thanksgiving Day. Yup, that holiday that I wanted to relate to. I imagine that my ancestors were part of the landing party on the Mayflower. Man, it just pumps me up thinking that Filipinos should participate in this occasion. Maybe there is a Filipino/a in the Mayflower performing some support role. Yeah right. No Filipino Puritans. I'm not history expert but this one I can bet the farm on. LOL.

During the past 20 or so years the turkey has been replaced by Armenian garlic chicken. Ofcourse it's backed. No more turkey. They're too big and takes days to consume. The chicken is manageable. It's gone in a couple of sittings. What's up with cranberry sauce? I can't relate to that sauce. Garlic paste is waaayyyy better. Spicy as heck. Leaves that odor in your breath. Man I'm alive.

Turkey stuffing? Hmm... and gravey. Nasty stuff but I used to down tons of this thing. My weight can prove this. Ohh how I hate those pics from the 80's. Yuck.

Being a Filipino, I am indeed thankful that our parents dragged our ass here and just gambled with destiny. Atleast here, the poor can make it with hard work, lots of dreams, and darn pure persistence. A little, or a lot of education can also help. I don't know of any lazy rich people. If there are any, they were born with it.

I'm getting ready with my third job this year. Sounds bad but not really. I'm a free spirit that wants to try out new opportunities. If they don't work out then move on to the next one. The bottomline is that I get another job. It's easy to just sell everything and live a simple lazy life but why? There are goals to be met. Financial, sociatal, educational, blah, blah, blah. Too many to mention. The mind needs to be constantly thinking of new opportunities. Not bogged down by the past and past experiences or failures. There are no failures, just lessons of life. Yup, harsh ones but eye openers.

I drove my MB today and I just say who would have known I'll have one of these luxury ride. I rode the bus for about a decade. The bus pass my friend, passport to freedom. It's hard to go back to waiting on the bus bench for hours waiting for the bus but you have to do what you have to do.

A new year is coming and this year was definitely an eye opener. I was burned out of nursing and quit a job that offers tons of benefits. There is a price to pay though. I finally decided that the price is not worth it. What is the price? High stess, work as a dog, idiot bosses, and red tape. There are jobs that offers less but doesn't ask for me to pay the price. Dude, life is short. Keep moving on. I don't look back much now. I learn from the past and then letting it go.

I wanted to do more photography next year. I did an uncle's funeral and shooting pics is just too natural. My camera seetings are on the money. The shots are photojournalistic. Can't help it if people poses, hey we're Filipinos. We will pose and smile and make funny faces. Love it.

Weekend off.

It was a really relaxing day. Played with the computer. Walked around a bookstore, Good Guys and CompUSA without buying anything. I was close on buying some stuff. I had the merchadise on my fat hands. I was in line, then I decided I don't need them.

This is rare, I always find something to buy. I had to control expenses as I just bought some real expensive dental services. I found this dentist in San Dimas that my insurance covers. He was able to show me my decaying teeth. Yup 20 years of neglect has resulted in lost molars and decaying teeth. I have a root canal scheduled next week, my second this year alone. I will have a partial made to cover the gap in my upper teeth and a bridge on my lower teeth. There is also bleaching scheduled so the teeth will look nice. I can't afford transplants. Maybe someday I will win the lotto and then I'll get some of those too. I have atleast seven crowns ordered and the total bill was enormous. Thanks god for insurance and monthly payments. My dental health is finally catching up to the years of neglect. SMILE.

Dental care is nearly a luxury. Dentists are not reluctant to charge premium rates for their services. I guess that's how the AMA likes it. They control the amount of practicing dentists in this country. The lower the supply the higher the demand and the higher the price. I don't believe I know a poor dentist. This doctor in San Dimas has plasma monitors in the patient's chair. He can show the innards of the mouth with a camera. His xray machine doesn't use any film. The images goes straight to the computer when the xray was made. The chair was ultra comfortable. The financial consultants know there stuff. Credit was applied so this poor nurse can afford this luxury of crowns and bridges and bleaching. I will look like the guy from The Swan when I finish this exercise. LOL. All camera purchases will be on hold for the next freaking century. Oh well, time for more overtime.

While eating, one of the 4 temporary crowns popped out. All day, I was being careful of breathing. Cold air touching the naked nerve shoots pain signals to my brain. It was rough. Around night time, I decided to go to the store and get me some pain paste to apply on the tooth. Behold, they make the adhesive the dentists use available for mass consumption. For $4 plus change, you can get a white material to apply to the loose crown and replace it on the tooth. It was god sent. It hurt a bit upon replacement of the crown but the pain later subsided.

Breathing is now better and I can drink water without pain. The crown is holding on good. I think I will sleep good tonight.

Last day at work.

I'm on call today and had 2 patients this morning. The schedulers called to tell me if another nurse can pick up my second patient as his patient's dialysis was cancelled. I agreed to give up the 2nd patient to prepare me for any late call during the night.

I took a nap during the afternoon and sure enough a call came in at 5 pm. There is a stat dialysis in one of the local hospital. I know the patient. She was in a rehab center about a month or so ago. She looks sick and non responsive. To make a short story shorter and to protect the innocent of confidential details, The treatment was cut short and I ended up going home early. No sweat, The night is young and anything can happen.

I woke up at 6:30 am, Saturday. I'm no longer part of the dialysis team. I tried it as long as I can but it's just not for me. The structure in the company was non-existent. Do as you go it seems is the way this job goes. For others it's a perfect job. Go in any time and finish your work anytime. It was nice except the day can be really long. Nauseatingly, long. Patients don't want to see me and they complain of my treatment when they don't feel well. Well, I wasn;'t reponsible for their illness, I'm here to help them. It was the most thankless job in this already thankless nursing job that I had. To make things worst, the pay really sucks.

No work today. Happy birthday mom.

I have no patient assignment today. I guess the census is low. We were promised that things will pick up during the fall. The census has never picked up and I can't make a living waiting at home. My decision to quit yesterday gets better and better. As my brother said, I have to do things that will meet my needs and goals.

Today is my mom's birthday. I will light a candle for her and bring some flowers at the cemetery. She would have been 65 today. I miss her a lot. Happy birthday mom. Love you.

Yesterday was a really nice day. It rained in the afternoon on the way to DJ Bibingkahan. That's one of the many Filipino restaurants in Covina. I had some monggo and rice. The weather felt like the monsoon season in the Phil. The meal and the ambience gave me that nostalgic feel of summer back in the islands. Man, it was great.

I resigned today.

I woke up early to try if I can cath my sister before she goes to work. She called in sick, she needs to catch up with house work accumulated from a week of vacationing. I need to get something from her.

I was at home thinking about my work status and how I hated work. The low pay, pushing the machines, and so many other things. I decided to resign so I told my boss I will give her a week's notice. After a few minutes of talking to the former boss, another call came in from the hospital I interviewed with last Friday and they are offering me a job. The pay is good and it's only a few miles from home. There is good benefits. A sign on bonus and $1000 certificate for BestBuy as an incentive for signing up early. Not bad for a bonus. The job is for surgical ICU, open heart, and it's day shift and it's 12 hour shift for 3 days a week. This will free 4 days for other things.
I met the staff and they seems upbeat. They only get 1-3 surgeries per day. It's fast track, meaning the patient is up on the chair the next day. The volume is no where close to my former employer's volume of 7-8 surgeries per day.

There is floating to the ER but I'm open about that now since this is not a trauma ER. I used to hate ER floats. I don't know what to do there and I'm just resistant to the idea. Now, who cares. The day will be over and tomorrow is another day.

I went to the gym today. Just to remove the stress in my mind about my resignation. It's all in the mind. The problems in life is all in the mind. There are no problems, only our thoughts that created them.

I signed up for registry 2 weeks ago and they are calling me big time. I should give them some time this week. Maybe for Wednesday, I'll have to see. It's easy to find a nursing job but I'm kinda picky. Not all jobs are created equal.

United States of Canada

I saw a map of Canada including the blue states. I kinda like it since this wasy I don't have to move to Canada. No only that, the acronym is really nice. USC.

Speaking of USC the number ONE football team in the nation almost lost yesterday. Man, that fog over Corvialis, Oregon was eiree. USC won, thank God.

On Call
I'm on call today. Fortunately, I have no patients this morning. On call means 24 hr availability. A friend of mine in San Diego said it's bad. He had worked until the wee hours of the morning.

The pool has been darined but a little bit of water is left in the bottom. Tomorrow I have an appointment for a pool guy to see if I can update this water hole. Replaster, retile and a little bit of redesign. There is limited budget for this project so we'll see what the designer has to offer.

Canada seems to have a strict requirement for employment. Bums like me are not welcome in their socialist society. Too bad, I was looking forward to living in the tundra. Another thing is my inability to speak French. I can't even speak Ilocano. New Zealand and Australia are nice places to visit. They speak funny english there so I don't think I can stand living there. Love shrimp on the bar-b though.

Oh the shrub is on t.v. again talking about the war he started. What a boob. As my brother said, another 4 years of great Saturday Night Live. LOL.

My boss called last night and told me I'm on call and that she will be available to help me if I get overwhelmed. What a great boss. Something that I'm not used to. I've called her several times when I get my back up against the wall and she bailed me out. I'm more confident with my work now that I've learned a few tricks and short cuts.

Time to drain.

In the past 2 years, we had a couple of big fires in the mountains near my house. This events dumped tons of ash in my good 'ole swimming pool. Last summer, I had to use quite a bit of chemicals to keep things in balance. Then I decided to have a complete diagnostic of my pool chemistry and found out that the water is just plain old. I replaced the water a few years back and ofcourse with evaporation I had to fill it up numerous times. This time, it's time to dump it again.

I rented a pool pump and 200 feet of 2 inch hose to get rid of the stale water. I started at 10:30 a.m. and I'm still pumping. It's 6:30 p.m. There is an estimated 30,000 gallons of water in this pool. Two of my neighbors came to ask what's going on and to find out if things are okay. They see copious amounts of water being dumped and their curiosity just need to be satisfied. I told them I'm draining my pool. It's nice that there are people who cares.

I'm still shocked about the shrub's second term. It will take me awhile to get over it. I'm even considering about moving to Canada. You know, if you don't like it, leave type of mentality. It's colder than a brass monkey's ass in Canada so I can't possibly move there. I'll freeze my behind off.

Unbelievable!

The shrub looks like will rule the earth, AGAIN. Americans are crazy to re-elect this Arab kissing, oil profit loving, war mongering, imbicile. It was a sad 4 years for this country and another sadder 4 more years. Time to hunker up for the next term as things will get worst.

I should watch what the dipshit will do after he gets sworn in. He'll probably go on vacation. Funny, even Mt. St. Helen is erupting more today. Mother Nature is repulsed by the fact the town idiot is back in office.

I'm proud of California for not voting for the moron. California was never treated well by the Republicans. Okay, so the governor is a republican but he's Arnold. He's one of the few cool republicans. He should be president so we can all drive Humvies. Yeepee.

Enough political opinions. The FBI might come knocking on my door. See, if I were a secret service agent, I will be depressed. I can't imagine risking my life for a scumbag. LOL